So who is Kevin? Kevin is a name that comes up in quite a few of my songs, so what’s up with Kevin?
Let’s go back to my second primary school, aged 6, Kevin was the school bully, he was bigger badder and nastier than anyone else, everyone hated Kevin, although to be honest I was slightly drawn to this bully character and a made of point of challenging him to public fights which I lost systematically, I don’t know quite why I did it, either to gain respect from the others, or gain Kevin’s. I was generally very good at primary school with above average grades, but for some reason I was attracted to the “bad yins”. Anyway Kevin N1 wasn’t particularly nice, but he wasn’t that bad, he probably got bullied himself, and hopefully he grew up to be a decent human being.
Kevin N2, a few years later we moved and I changed school again, new school, new pupils, new Kevin, same bully! This Kevin was ginger and to be fair he wasn’t the biggest baddest he was just a bit nasty. But that marked me, are all Kevin’s bullies?
The next year a new Kevin joined the school, he was an utter asshole, extremely unlikeable, a petty thief, and loved to pick on anyone weaker than him. Yet another bad Kevin, unbelievable! So this Kevin actually grew up to be a murderer and went to jail, know as the Suitcase killer, as he packed his unfortunate victim into a suitcase and dumped him in the river before being caught.
Next Kevin at High school was a short cross eyed guy, he was an absolute twat, bad Kevin number three.
I never knew anyone at school called Kevin who wasn’t a bell end.
In their defence there are some well known honorable men named Kevin, Kevin Keagan, Kevin Costner, Kevin Spacey (oh well maybe not!)
There were also some real bad folks named Terry and Jamie, I’m a bit suspicious of them too!
I think I’m gonna make a song called Kevin!
Moral of the story, please DON’T call your kids Kevin, you’re asking for trouble!
Edit : My old High School burned down in 2019, probably by a Kevin!
But ultimate irony the new Headmaster is called Kevin!
